


Small Things

by hunters_retreat



Category: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Genre: Christmas, First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-09
Updated: 2014-04-09
Packaged: 2018-01-18 17:35:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1436893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hunters_retreat/pseuds/hunters_retreat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was started, had been started when he stood outside John’s door, stupid pair of fingerless gloves wrapped in yesterday’s funny page with a purple ribbon he’d found on the side of the street tied around it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Small Things

 

  
He stared at the bundle in his hands and didn’t know what to do with it.  He knew, he remembered what it had been like, 7 years old and rushing down the hall to see the tree lit up with presents spilling out from under the tree like some kind of gift wrapped avalanche.  That was when he believed in Santa.  It was when he believed in God.  It was when he still believed in the fairness of the universe and the goodness of men.

It was before Judgment Day.

But he was back again, and he knew that in this time, he got to see his 8th Christmas and he wondered what Kyle was going to get him and what his younger self would get his brother.  Better than the jacket, only slightly bloodied that Derek had found for him to keep him from freezing to death in the night from the other timeline.

He thought maybe he should go back and just pretend he didn’t do this, but then John opened his door before Derek could knock and he was standing there looking at his nephew with a handful of Christmas present and two more hidden in his closet to give to him in the morning.

“Derek?”

“I… we used to… on Christmas Eve.  Kyle and I used to open a present.”  He shoved it at John and walked away, realizing how stupid it all was.  He could never make up for the things the world had taken from John.  He’d always be another reminder of why he grew up without a father, of why his future was going to be bleak and with so very little hope.

They didn’t have a back yard anymore, just the fire escape in the apartment Derek had found.  They’d gone under, Sarah and Cameron leading the metal away before they’d come back around and he didn’t expect them for another week at the least.  He wanted to make it up to John that his mother wasn’t there, but from what little John had said, Sarah Connor didn’t know how to celebrate the holiday anymore either.

He settled himself on the fire escape and took a deep breath, trying to remember a time when it felt like he could breathe deep without the world pressing in trying to collapse his lungs.

It only took a few minutes before John found him, followed him out into the cool night.  He was about to admonish him about being out in the cold, but then John pulled one of the heavy blankets out with him and covered them both, sitting shoulder to shoulder with him.

“Thank you.”

“It was nothing.”  He said brusquely but he could tell from the quiet way John said it that it was.

“I was ten when my Mom stopped celebrating Christmas.”  He said softly.  “Ten when she told me that the only presents I could expect from the world were pain and misery.  She said I had to learn to be harder than other men, tougher than other men.  I had to learn to take from the world instead of wait to be given.”

Derek took a deep breath because it was a good lesson, but it was harsh as well.  As much as he knew they needed John Connor in the future, he worried about what sort of man Sarah Connor was turning her son into.

“So I took what I wanted when I could.  Sometimes though,” He said with a bitter laugh. “Sometimes I want someone to give something to me, just because they want to.  So thank you.”

Bitter laughter but true words and no matter that it was his nephew, he knew he understood him better than he had anyone else in his life.  He had the feeling John felt the same way about him.

When he looked at John, he realized this was one of those moments his future self was always talking about, the moments where you had a choice to make and no matter how hard you tried to think it through, sometimes you had to take the blind leap and trust your instinct.

He sat up and leaned over John, pressing their lips together.  His hand came up to pull him into the right angle and as his tongue brushed against his nephew’s lower lip he opened to him.  He swallowed John’s moan and John wrapped his arm around Derek’s waist, pulling them closer. 

He pulled away, trying to get his breath, knowing that this was no where close to finished.  It wouldn’t be until they were both tired and sated, lying in their combined sweat and semen and maybe even blood.  It didn’t matter.  It was started, had been started when he stood outside John’s door, stupid pair of fingerless gloves wrapped in yesterday’s funny page with a purple ribbon he’d found on the side of the street tied around it.

He took a deep breath and looked into John’s eyes.  John nudged him slightly with his nose, then gave a small hesitant smile.

He looked at his nephew, thought about the ways John Connor was saving humanity, and thought about the way that maybe he was saving John Connor, and he smiled back.  He didn’t know if John could read his mind, or if it ran through his own as well, but then he pressed a quick kiss to Derek’s lips and laughed softly against his throat.  “It’s always the small things that change everything.”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> To my TSCC friends! Merry Christmas! Enjoy!


End file.
